InTensions™ are impossible binds where both poles are necessary but mutually exclusive. When people experience these, standard interventions often fail because the problem isn’t lack of knowledge, insight, or motivation – it’s being caught in a psychological architecture where both staying and leaving, both persisting and stopping, both knowing and can feel impossible at the...Read More
Most capable people have learned that persistence is a strength. You stayed with hard things. You didn’t quit at the first sign of difficulty. You pushed through uncertainty before and it worked. Often, that capacity is part of how you became competent, reliable, or successful in the first place. So when something important feels stalled,...Read More
Many people I work with know exactly what their next step should be. They can describe it clearly. They’ve thought it through. They may even have done similar things successfully in the past. And yet, starting feels strangely difficult, and they resist. This moment is often misdiagnosed as procrastination, a lack of motivation, or avoidance....Read More
If you’ve ever ended the day exhausted yet mentally unfinished, or stared at a task knowing exactly what to do and still struggled to begin, you know the weight of executive function load at the transition or “hinge” points. These are the moments when effort shifts direction: stopping something already in motion, switching from one...Read More
In The Science of Rituals, Part One: 5 Small Reasons They Help You Do Big Things you learned that rituals are intentional, symbolic acts that help your brain manage anxiety, strengthen self-control, and create psychological transitions. You might be thinking: isn’t ritual just a fancy word for habit? Nope. Your brain experiences them differently. (Stay...Read More
Every morning, I follow the same sequence. Dogs out. Breakfast. Coffee. Then I sit in the same chair in my quiet house, phone on silent, and close my eyes. Three long, deep breaths. Each one releases distraction and invites focus. Only then do I begin to write. This is a ritual. It’s the anchor of...Read More
We all tell stories about ourselves. Especially to ourselves. Our brains do it automatically, by stitching moments into meaning, so we can feel like we’re the same person from one day to the next. When that system is working well, it helps us see patterns, learn from experience, and connect the dots between who we...Read More
Every new technology sparks similar headlines: This changes everything. But as technology analyst Benedict Evans in The Knowledge Project’s podcast reminds us, the most transformative tools—like automatic elevators or the touchscreen—eventually fade into the background. They become invisible. AI is heading the same way. So the question for parents and professionals isn’t “Will my learner...Read More
Families often ask this question as if there were a clear answer. But there isn’t. Safety? Reach? Those are about supposed acceptance. But you can’t replay your life at multiple colleges and compare outcomes before your choice. Research can show patterns, but it can’t fully capture chance encounters, shifting economies, or how individual psychology interacts...Read More
I recently conducted mock interviews with three different AI systems for high-stakes human roles. When I asked them to describe their weaknesses, a typical interview question, here’s what they revealed: “I can process vast amounts of information instantly and generate responses that sound insightful. But I have no idea if what I’m saying actually resonates...Read More
